I Got Overwhelmed!

Good morning everyone! I hope your Sunday is going well.

 

So I have, I mean had a YouTube channel. At first it was so fun and I enjoyed every part of it. Fast forward to December and I decided to try Vlogmas. I had to post a video every day until the 25th. This was stressful. Some days we had nothing going on and even though I planned a lot of Christmas activities Chloe didn’t want to do many of them. Trying to force content was not healthy for my family. I even got depressed. It was so easy to get caught up in how many views I had or how many subscribers I had. That’s not the reason I was doing this, but I couldn’t help it.

After Christmas I tried to keep a balance, but I still felt like I had a camera in Chloe’s face all the time. She didn’t care and even had fun with it, but some days I felt horrible about it. I knew something had to change, so I started only vlogging during the week and taking the weekends off. The hours it takes to edit, add music to, export and upload a video became overwhelming.  I started feeling anxious again.

So this past Friday night my husband told me he wasn’t comfortable having Chloe on YouTube. I thought he was ok with it since I was doing this to help other families like ours. I respect what he thinks and told him I needed a break and I would stop. He asked if I could delete the videos and I said I could. So I filmed a farewell video, with the hopes that I could come back on my own, without Chloe.

It wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. I sat up until after 1 am Friday night and deleted the videos one by one, I appreciated that so many of my subscribers were sad to see us go. I loved my subscribers. I have made friends with a few of them. I do think I will be back with my own channel, without Chloe. Its better for her and I wont have to vlog every single day. I am going to enjoy the break for now and discuss this more with my husband. Today has been a calm and relaxing day.

I know I need to do what is best for me and my family. I love doing this blog. I love to write and this is not stressful at all for me. So I will try to post fun and interesting posts for you. Thank you to all of my followers. I appreciate you so much for supporting me. So that is the latest new in my world. LOL.

Have a very blessed day

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3 thoughts on “I Got Overwhelmed!”

  1. It’s a shame it was causing so much pressure. We have a channel for my grandson (called Full Time Sprout) but it isn’t about his autism. YouTube has been good for him as it helps him express himself. He has done toy videos and park videos and they have been lovely for us to look back on as he has grown. He has now discovered gaming and football. I suspect that will be what he channel will be all about as he grows up. But he understands it could make him some money and he loves it when someone subscribes. But he isn’t under any pressure to make videos though. Just when he wants to. X

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s understandable. We are a bit like that with the blog I’m doing – feeling exposed and as well, worrying about the children’s privacy. I am sure you have made the right decision for you all xx

        Liked by 1 person

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